Thursday, September 10, 2015
ARE YOUR NARCISSIST EX AND HIS NEW VICTIM PLAYING “FACEBOOK FANTASY LAND”? BUT, WAIT...HE MISSES YOU?
It's very common for the narcissist to start, immediately after your break up, to post up on Facebook all about his “new love”, who actually is not new at all since he's been involved with her for months.
As Sinefeld would say, “What's up with that?” I call it Facebook Fantasy Land since it's a game to him, like fantasy football.
Oh, yea, it's a real high keeping the affair a secret, but now that you've split, he makes it seem as if he JUST met her. He wants everyone to know she is MADLY in love with him....of course she is, since he's all that. Besides, he wants to hurt you by rubbing your nose in it.
Then...suddenly....he calls you up or texts you. He's lonely. He misses you. He's made a huge mistake. This is called “hoovering”. It's all lies. He's just trying to feed his ego by getting you hooked AGAIN, and he has no plans to leave her at all. Or, he wants you as a back up plan in the event the new victim doesn't completely drink the kool-aid. This is called “triangulation”...pitting the two of you against each other to get you to “fight over him”. What an ego trip.
If you buy it and he does come back, it will start the cycle all over ...honeymoon period, devalue, then discard, AGAIN, and every time it happens, it hurts worse. The narcissist may do this as often as you will let him, and it's not uncommon for it to happen many times.
But, here's some advice that I came about the hard way: if someone is going to drink the kool-aid, don't let it be you.
at 11:42 AM